Can I Be a Witness?

Here is a little background that led me to Weddings Unveiled….

Personally I have more history dating men then women.  When dating men, I was not the kind of woman who spent much time fantasizing about my wedding day. Though I loved them, I couldn’t imagine spending the rest of my life with any of the guys I dated.  Sorry guys.  But when Julie and I started dating we knew right away that our relationship had the potential to be the one.  I found myself thinking about getting married more than ever before.  Freaked her out a couple times, actually. 

I finally found a great partner for me on so many levels.  She is kind, hysterically funny (I am sharing a link here to her latest performance to prove it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7dHCqqn2G8E), commited to herself and to me, employed, stable, more fun than anyone I’ve ever met. Not much more I can ask for.  Her nickname for a while was Jackpot.  And yet, I could not commit to her fully.  Not because I did not want to but because it was against the law. 

The implications of not being able to marry her are vast.  The blatant message that what we are doing is so wrong, that it should be illegal, like stealing or murder, seeps into the backdrop of our culture.  In turn whether we want it to or not, it seeps into our own minds and regardless of our intellectual capacity or emotional security we experience internalized homophobia on some level.  In addition, the part of weddings that I always love, is the gathering of a community to witness and agree to support the couple in love.  The couple gets to be seen and their love celebrated.  And by not allowing same sex couples this opportunity, it ensures limited visibility to our love and our relationships.  Even if we come out to the world, the world only lets us come out so far. 

So, a very short time after it became legal to marry in New York, I knew I wanted to plan weddings for same sex couples.  I never thought of being a wedding planner before this.  This shift in New York State has created a shift in my career path.  I am so excited to enter this field at this particular moment.  Though it has been a long time coming, it is here right now (at least in New York anyway) and I am thrilled to create a life for myself where I get to witness joyful, moving and much anticipated moments in history.